Mindfulness

The practice of mindfulness is the first step towards healing.

A Note From Me, Now

I wrote the post below years ago, before I had the clinical language I use today and before my own body taught me just how essential nervous system regulation and presence truly are.

While my understanding of physiology, trauma, and stress has deepened, the heart of this message still matters. Learning how to observe ourselves — without judgment — remains one of the most powerful tools we have for navigating life, relationships, and healing.

I’m leaving this here because mindfulness isn’t a trend. It’s a practice humans have returned to for centuries, especially in times of overwhelm.

I didn’t come to mindfulness as a philosophy. I came to it because my body forced me to stop. During my first major crash — when pushing through was no longer an option — I remember listening to a talk by Jon Kabat-Zinn and later reading Full Catastrophe Living. The phrase landed because I was living it. Learning how to observe instead of override myself became a lifeline. Long before I had language for nervous system regulation, I was learning how to stay present without collapsing or fighting what was happening.

Mindfulness: Learning to Observe Without Losing Yourself

A long time ago, humans became consciously aware of thought.

We noticed that there were two perspectives happening at once:
the direct experience of life, and the awareness of that experience.

Across cultures and traditions, this distinction was described in many ways — body and soul, ego and consciousness, mind and observer. And from that realization, spiritual practice was born.

The body experiences.
The observer notices.

This practice of awareness has existed for centuries because it works. And it still works today.

To understand what I mean by the observer self, consider this:
You’re in the middle of a disagreement. You feel the anger rise. The thoughts come fast — “This is ridiculous,” “They’re wrong,” “I’m so frustrated.”

In that moment, you can be fully immersed in the experience — being the anger — or you can notice it.

When you observe the experience rather than identify with it, something shifts. You’re no longer inside the reaction; you’re watching it. This isn’t avoidance or emotional suppression. It’s awareness.

And awareness creates space.

That space is what allows us to respond instead of react.
To choose instead of explode.
To stay present instead of getting swept away.

One of the simplest ways to practice this is through mindfulness meditation.

A Simple Mindfulness Practice

Find a comfortable space. Try to begin your meditation the same way each time — this helps your nervous system recognize that it’s safe to slow down.

Start by observing your breath.
No need to change it. Just notice the inhale and the exhale.

After a few moments, gently widen your awareness to the present moment. Begin noticing your external environment and labeling what you observe:

“Hearing traffic.”
“Feeling the chair beneath me.”
“Smelling the air.”

Next, turn your attention to your thoughts.
Your job is not to fix them, judge them, or make them stop — only to notice them.

If you think, “This is stupid,” you might label it:
“Judging.”

If a memory arises, you might say:
“Remembering.”

Then notice sensations in the body:
“Tightness in the chest.”
“Warmth in the hands.”
“Pressure in the forehead.”

You may also notice emotions. Simply name them:
“Anger.”
“Sadness.”
“Joy.”

If your mind wanders — and it will — just notice:
“Mind wandering,”
and gently return to your breath.

Start with ten minutes. That’s enough. Over time, this capacity to observe strengthens — like a muscle. It’s a practice, but overtime it becomes easier and more natural to be able to observe rather than react so fast.

What you may begin to notice

As mindfulness grows, you’ll notice something subtle but powerful:
You become more objective in daily life.

You’re less reactive.
More grounded.
More choiceful.

This is especially helpful in moments of conflict or stress. Awareness allows you to stay conscious of how you’re responding — to yourself and to others — instead of running on autopilot.

Mindfulness helps you wake up to your life.
To experience it fully, without being consumed by it.

You learn to see through the eyes of your human self — and also from a steadier, wiser place within.